Dear Homeschooler

Dear homeschooler, (or terrified parent jumping into the home education pool),
Home education doesn’t (and hopefully shouldn’t!) look like public education. There are many paths to take to the same destination. Children are not meant to sit in one seat for hours on end. Education can happen anywhere!

If the options available to you are not a good fit you can make something that is.
Technically if you are going the route of online school, or say a K12 program, you are not homeschooling. Your child is still a public school student, just based at home. This may be the right choice for you and your child. For us, we started with a K12 program when our oldest was in kindergarten. And it was the most miserable experience and in the end I felt like we wasted those 2 years. But every state is different and has different laws around what K12’s can offer. For me it is a total dealbreaker if you expect my child to sit in front of a computer for hours.
I decided that instead of fighting for what my children need I would just cut out the middle man and do it myself.
EDUCATION DOES NOT HAVE TO BE CENTERED AROUND A SCREEN

Buy that extra bookcase.
Just trust me on this one…

Don’t be a control freak.
I can’t tell you how many friends over the years have said to me “I wish I could homeschool but (child) won’t listen to me and needs a teacher to instruct them.”
Children are people, just smaller and with less control.
Can you imagine a better time to discover how to communicate with your child? To discover what they are truly passionate about? Taking the time to understand your child’s learning style and what matters to them will open up so many doors to a closer relationship to your child. Children can be involved in their education plan.
At the beginning of each school year we make a list as a family to plan out any extra areas of study they want to focus on, any skills they want to learn, field trip ideas, etc.

A few years ago we switched to using funschooling (also called thinking tree journals) for our youngest. I saw a complete change in her excitement over her education. We still study the basics but she also gets time to delve into subjects she is passionate about. And yes, that means part of schoolwork is studying cryptozoology.

Time is on your side
Because time isn’t wasted going back and forth to classes, sitting and waiting, and everything else that happens at school that isn’t “education”, you will find you have time to allow your children to take on projects they might never be able to. Our youngest loves doing kind deeds and when she was only 8 she started a charity “Lucy’s Stitched Hugs“. So far she’s donated somewhere around 1200 to 1500 stuffed animals and quilts to hospitals, emergency placement foster home facilities, and organizations that assist families struggling with homelessness. There is no way she would be able to do this while in public school!

Take a detour. You’ll still get there!
If your child has an interest in a subject explore it, whether its a passing interest or not! My youngest went through a phase of being intensely interested in everything related to Ancient Egypt. We were lucky enough that a King Tut exhibit was at OMSI at the time so I took her and let her spend as much time as she wanted exploring the exhibit and making notes. We checked out a plethora of books from the library and purchased a few favorites. I printed off Egyptian themed worksheets and activities from online (A lifetime membership to Education.com has been worth every penny for just such occasions!) We found Egyptian recipes and tried them out. Here is her sarcophagus she made on her own one evening while waiting for bedtime. True education has no starting and ending time!

Challenges do not need to define a child
One of the biggest reasons we chose to homeschool was because our oldest has special needs. She has Autism and a developmental delay. Our second daughter is also on the spectrum. Because we homeschool we don’t have to fight for accommodations or inclusion. If something isn’t working or needs to be changed I don’t need permission from anyone to do it. There doesn’t have to be endless conversations about challenges and how to work around them. We are able to focus on strengths and work on strengthening areas that need it without it becoming a huge deal. Our school district wanted us to enroll our oldest in a special education program when she was only 4. This would have required her being heavily medicated. To date the only thing we have had to medicate her for is her sleeping disorder. Separation anxiety and behavioral issues have all been able to be worked through without medication. A public school journey would have involved a lot of medications over the years and I just didn’t want that for her.
Amelia was completely non verbal. But here she is reading to our pet cockatiel, something some doctors never believed would happen!

Don’t forget life!
Life itself holds so much education. Another homeschool Mom gave me a great tip once. Pick an area of the house for each day of the week and work as a team to do any extra cleaning for that area. (For example, Mondays could be bathrooms, Tuesdays could be kitchen, etc)
Involve your kids with cooking, math is so much more fun if you get to bake cookies!

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve taught cooking classes and I’m shocked at the number of families not teaching their kids this important life skill. As they get older and more confident they can help with meal planning and cooking on their own. I remember my Mom taught me how to compare prices using the per ounce price in small print on grocery store labels. Too many kids are entering adulthood without the crucial life skill of being able to budget, shop, and cook for themselves.

Homeschooling does not make your kids socially awkward
I don’t know why some people still believe this. Public school is not designed to develop social skills. I was mostly public schooled but I was homeschooled for a few years. Homeschoolers are by far more likely to be accepting, less judgmental, and more comfortable in their own skin. Peer pressure loses its power when the fear of daily bullying goes away.
I was once criticized for my daughters social skills… while said person’s kids would not put their cell phones done to play a game. This person also is somehow assumes that autism can be “socialized” away. It doesn’t really work that way any more than you can socialize away autism.
Are my kids weird? Sure. I’m pretty sure all kids are weird.
EVERYONE IS SOMEBODY ELSE’S WEIRDO
I knew plenty of weird kids in public school too. I was totally a weird kid. I practically lived hiding behind my fathers leg and then behind a book. I am so grateful I wasn’t forced to be someone I wasn’t and given the time to grow out of being shy. It usually isn’t a lifelong condition.
We opted on not participating in a coop because honestly, none fit in our schedule. For many years school was done around therapy schedule as my oldest went to occupational and speech therapy a couple times a week and I also just didn’t find the right fit. Being on our own meant I could tailor everything to meet my daughters exactly where they were and grow from there. I volunteer as a 4-H leader and that has provided lots of social time and a local autism group has a tween / teen social club and service group that has been wonderful. Find the right fit for your kid.

You need more quantity of time if you want quality of time
You cannot have true quality time if you don’t have quantity time as well. Having more time together means a closer knit family and more opportunities to appreciate each other, and learn and grow together!

The most important thing I want to tell you?
NOBODY is better equipped or more motivated to teach your child.

Some favorite resources:
Funschooling.com

Education.com

Local zoos and museums – we keep a membership to our local zoo (the Oregon Zoo) and with that comes a reciprocal membership. Each month we also have a guest membership to a different local attraction. So we can go as much as we want within the month to that attraction. We’ve really missed our zoo with Covid. My youngest LOVES catching zookeepers and talking their ears off with animal facts and questions. They are always excited to see a kid so interested in learning!

Our local library has an experience pass as well. Using your library card you can get passes to educational attractions and exhibits. Ask your local library staff what your library has available for resources for homeschooling!

I’m not going to list all the curriculum choices because honestly that would take forever. We have tried many and what I will say is that for us a program that offers all subjects tends to be lacking in areas. But if you go through a math program for your math curriculum they will probably be better equipped in that subject since that is their main focus.
Be prepared to change it up. We started with Singapore math and I thought it was great… and it did go well for awhile. They I came to a realization that too much repetitive work makes the wheels fall off the bus for my youngest. So we’ve switched to Learn Math Fast and so far, so good!
Once I bought ahead 5 years of science curriculum because I thought it was so amazing. First year was fine. Second year I was informed with a heavy sigh “I all ready know all this stuff”. After taking all the review tests I realized that yes, indeed she did know all that stuff. All 4 more years worth.
Now, having an amazing memory is a superpower of kids on the spectrum. But even so I don’t purchase to far ahead now in case we need to make adjustments. Many curriculum have sample pages on their website so you can have your kid give it a try as well.

Exodus Books is a semi local bookstore that sells new and used curriculum (they ship as well!) They’ve been very helpful for us.

Literary Leftovers is a sweet little used bookstore that has a small homeschool curriculum selection. We always find something there! Find local to you used bookstores, they are often good places to look.

Local Facebook groups – odds are there are homeschooling groups on Facebook local to you. It can be helpful to connect with others and sometimes you can find used curriculum for sale locally this way as well.

If you have preschoolers a friend just launched Joey School (A parent led preschool curriculum). If I had a preschooler I would totally use it!

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